The Mathematic Solution to Bullying


 

A recent CTV article addresses a study that claims “Bullies may enjoy seeing others in pain.” Although the article does not say it we are once again into the debate over nature versus nurture. Like in all things the truth is a bit of both. If you teach your child something he / she will react physically in a different way, his brain will work differently. That said, the one commentor who said “if our children, the ones called Nerds and so forth would learn some basic self-defence tactics, they would not be bullied. ” is wrong. Self defence is last line of defence against a bully ,walking away is the first. This article shows that bullies will find some target no matter what. There will always be a person with a lower self image, even if all children’s self images are raised. So in teaching your child self defence you are stopping one child from being bullied. In teaching your child to love oneanother you are stopping many children from being bullied. Simple Logic.

If we are to apply a mathmatical equation to this it works. This was a bit of a surprise to me, when I first thought about applying a mathematical equation in positivist way to bullying.(though I tend to be a more subjective person)

Violence is negative in this equation.Taking bullying as violence and self defence as violence of a different form

A Negative + A Negative = A Negative (a larger or smaller negatiuve but inevitably a negative)

Violence + Violence = Violence (again more or less violence but still violence)

A Negative + Zero (or neutral) = A Negative

Violence + Nonviolence = violence because -1 + 0 = -1 (some might disagree, and I know this does not always apply, but logically it works – keep in mind human behavior is not always logical)

A Negative + A Positive = Can be either a positive or a negative depending on the values -1 + +2 = +1 but -3 + +2 = -1

Violence + Love = Either (theoretically speaking as many religious teachers say Love can overcome Violence and hate, but not if the numbers of people that believe in love are not greater than those that believe in hate)

The only rational equation to get a positive result is

A Postive + A Positive = A Positive (always)

Love + Love = Love

So the only way to stop bullying is to ensure your child knows love and how to love.

Simple Logic.

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19 thoughts on “The Mathematic Solution to Bullying

  1. I went back to the CTV article and noted a response from “Socialism is Killing Us.” This guy writes in all the time with extraodinary rightwing comments. Here is his nonsense for the day
    ——————————————————————
    Socialism is killing us- Wirtes:
    It all comes down to parenting. Instead of being friends with your kids, be a parent to your kids. Kids don’t need parents as their friends. Kids need strict discipline. This political correctness not to hurt our kids feelings is B.S. I had to deal with bullies in grade school. I’m just glad my parents taught me to fight back.
    ——————————————————————-

    So to break this down don’t be your childrens friends, hurt them when they are bad and teach them to hit people.

    If as your name says “socialism is killing [you]” I hope it happens quickly so you can’t hurt any more children you creep.

  2. Strict dicipline is what caused so many kids in the past to be so fucked up. I hate abusive creeps like this guy and really feel sorry for his children.

  3. I am not entirely against discipline but when you have to discipline your child you should feel bad, feel remorse, feel sorry for having to do it, NOT FEEL PRIDE that you instilled strict discipline.

  4. OK, Bill, I have to comment on this. Sorry. In your original premise you are classifying all violence as negative. That is a subjective conclusion with which reasonable people could – on some occasions – disagree. I concede that violence is never the preferred solution, but I hold there are times when in a process of elimination it unfortunately becomes the best solution.

    I read the CTA item and noted its coverage of the report itself was necessarily skimpy. Not mentioned was the question of whether or not “bullies” could be taught to feel empathy for others undergoing pain. That point was simply omitted.

    In my experience many youthful “bullies” can quickly learn the empathy thing after they undergo a bit of pain mixed with humiliation themselves. Most “bullies” have undergone pain whilst growing up, but it is usually pain delivered by a person with overwhelming physical superiority, thus is associated with size and strength.

    But things can change when the conditions inflicting them change. Such as when a “Nerd” turns on a “bully” and publicly delivers a thrashing. When this result occurs – and I agree it is not ALL the time – the “Nerd” sometimes has contributed to the societal good by helping said “bully” with his psyche development, giving him a chance to learn empathy and thus eliminating – or at least reducing – the number of hia future “bullying” efforts. In my view.

    Cheers

  5. Bill, as to your comment 1 and 2, aren’t you reading too far into the fellow’s comment? He’s not saying discipline equals hurting his children. That’s your reading. In my view he’s saying your children need you to be the parent so they can be the kids. And I agree with that. We’ve all seen families where the parents are the kids and most of the kids are really messed up, though there are exceptions.

    It’s not very Canadian of you to wish him evil so strongly, is it?

    Cheers

  6. Perhaps the nerds revenge scenario works not all the equations are 100 % as I said “human behavior is not always logical” and once the damage is done how do you correct it that is the problem with idealism it fails under less than ideal conditions, but it is a good starting point.

    As for “Socialism is killing us.” i think I am pretty bang on in my assessment. I have had run ins with this guy (comment wise) before he tends to the name calling aggressive form of the far right. He looks for creative ways to get by the vulgarity censorship of CTV. He tells any one that is right of centre that they are “subintellects with illusions of normalcy.” He has strong disdain for teachers and thinks the media is always right wing. As you know I can respect a person that is right wing and has a valid point but this guy is in himself a bully. Can you imagine an aggressive person who enjoys name calling as this guy does, calling for strict discipline of children?

    He comes across as a nasty person. A kind person can discipline with self restraint but I have known too many nasty types that use strict discipline as a crutch for abuse. Not so much as abuse for warped enjoyment but indignant self righteous pleasure.

    “Socialism is killing us.” takes pleasure in abusing his opponents, discipline in the hands of a person that enjoys abuse is a dangerous thing.

  7. Sorry I meant to say the he thinks the media is always Left wing (can’t tell my left from my right I think I have to check which shoes I have on now) (-:

  8. OK, you know him better so I’ll bow to your reading. I’m pretty non-violent myself and don’t consider my physical appearance threatening, but its simply amazing how often I’ve seen bullies back down when I publicly and calmly articulate resistance to their attempts to exert their will over others. Even at this old age.

    Recently I blocked a young man [bully] from stealing a parking spot I was leaving because an elderly woman had been waiting patiently in traffic, turn signal blinking, for me to leave. He ended up apologizing to her and driving on, but if I hadn’t blocked him I know he would have parked and walked away without looking back.

  9. True once a bully is created sometimes it behooves us to not let them get their way. That said, at younger ages if a bully gets no violent reaction thus gratification then is the behavior instilled?

  10. As for the left wing nature of the media you may be right but from my point of view that is a good thing. However keep in mind the media makes a minimal effort at being nonbiased.

    On a sliding scale if they are 50% non biased, 30 % left wing, and 20 % right wing, then a right wing person may perceive them as anything fro 30 to 80 % left wing, and a left wing person will see them as anything from 20% to 70% right wing.

    Papers or news that looks over 80% right or left are usually rags not worthy of note, like our Sun Newspaper chain which employs mostly right of centre writers like Lowell Green and Earl McCrea both of which are openly right wing.

    I don’t know many US papers except USA Today and I only watch CNN, both of which from a Canadian perspective are centrist. (but CNN seems a bit right at times)

  11. Today “- Socialism is killing us” commented
    “Keeping it civil are ya Iggy? When monkeys fly out of my butt.”

    Let’s hope the man has a big butt.

  12. Bill said “at younger ages if a bully gets no violent reaction thus gratification then is the behavior instilled?” If a bully bullies and gets away with it the behavior becomes a learned social action technique and will be repeated at appropriate times ad infinitum. If, on the other hand, the bully does NOT get away with it a relearning process is hopefully engendered which in due time leads to a more acceptable social action technique. In my view. But the devil is in the details.

    I have to laugh at CNN being “rightist”. Only in their own minds, my friend. They totally ignore the key players on the right and instead try in influence the process by introducing and building up as “new conservative leaders yo-yos and flacks no actual conservative would give time to. They are so full of crap and distorted reporting that I think they keep of fleet of honey wagons on permanent retainer to service their headquarters building in Atlanta. In my view. [Honey wagons, btw, are septic tank pumpers – for those of you who don’t live in the countryside].

    Yes, from that comment “Siku” seems beyond civility. Btw, that’s a great acronym for him – “Sicko”.

    Cheers

  13. There is truth in your first part but if the bully is not concerned with which ever reaction he gets so long as he gets some sort of recognition then his social behavior does not change. If punishment makes him feel like someone cares he may do it again. However as I said if a bully is already created the mathematical approach falls apart. It seems that as in math the only real way to correct an error is to begin again and in child rearing this is not possible and so punishment becomes the only option. The key in my mind is to keep it as non-violent as possible.

    As for CNN’s social political bent keep in mind from a Canadian perspective all your media is right of center. Possibly I should have used Fox as an example

  14. The only thing the founders of South Park prove is our colleges and universities are the best in the world at turning out dysfunctional idiots. Folks who confuse scurrilous insults with intelligence and humor. Its too bad their parents gave up on them before they became teenagers, because thanks to pop culture they’ve become rich beyond their dreams whilst remaining psychologically dysfunctional.

    Never watched the show after I caught about 10 minutes of it early. My grown son watch it awhile a few years ago and then recognizing it as a one pony show showed his mother’s good sense and lost interest in it.

    Cheers

  15. Your colleges and universities don’t do too bad. The two writers behind south Park barely made it through. Trey Parker was kicked out of the university of Colorado for skipping class for an entire semestre, and Matt Stone holds a degree in mathematics and film from the University of Colorado. One does not have a degree and the other holds a micky mouse degree. Both have academic parents and it seems there are a number of academic families that think because one is born into academia one is brilliant as much as some Christians think that because they are born into a Christian family they are Christian. I only used the Christian family as a metaphor because it is the most apt example.

    That said, not having a degree does not mean you are not capable of genious but I suspect Parker and Stone are far from this label.

  16. Violence is not the best solution for bullying but you might need it at one piont of your life, and i agree that love is the best solution for bullying and not violence because if you do it with violence then you will hurt the other person and you will hurt yourself and everyone else.

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