A recent CTV article addresses a study that claims “Bullies may enjoy seeing others in pain.” Although the article does not say it we are once again into the debate over nature versus nurture. Like in all things the truth is a bit of both. If you teach your child something he / she will react physically in a different way, his brain will work differently. That said, the one commentor who said “if our children, the ones called Nerds and so forth would learn some basic self-defence tactics, they would not be bullied. ” is wrong. Self defence is last line of defence against a bully ,walking away is the first. This article shows that bullies will find some target no matter what. There will always be a person with a lower self image, even if all children’s self images are raised. So in teaching your child self defence you are stopping one child from being bullied. In teaching your child to love oneanother you are stopping many children from being bullied. Simple Logic.
If we are to apply a mathmatical equation to this it works. This was a bit of a surprise to me, when I first thought about applying a mathematical equation in positivist way to bullying.(though I tend to be a more subjective person)
Violence is negative in this equation.Taking bullying as violence and self defence as violence of a different form
A Negative + A Negative = A Negative (a larger or smaller negatiuve but inevitably a negative)
Violence + Violence = Violence (again more or less violence but still violence)
A Negative + Zero (or neutral) = A Negative
Violence + Nonviolence = violence because -1 + 0 = -1 (some might disagree, and I know this does not always apply, but logically it works – keep in mind human behavior is not always logical)
A Negative + A Positive = Can be either a positive or a negative depending on the values -1 + +2 = +1 but -3 + +2 = -1
Violence + Love = Either (theoretically speaking as many religious teachers say Love can overcome Violence and hate, but not if the numbers of people that believe in love are not greater than those that believe in hate)
The only rational equation to get a positive result is
A Postive + A Positive = A Positive (always)
Love + Love = Love
So the only way to stop bullying is to ensure your child knows love and how to love.